my 30th birthday

Jan 7

-this morning the first bird to rise woke me… it was around 4:30am. the world is the same everywhere: children cry over what they don’t get, dogs play together, and birds awaken in the same fashion. only one at first, so quietly that you must strain to hear if what was chirped was in fact real. then another wakes up, more chime in, the pitch is louder and they continue one upping another, until the entire bird village has been awoken! then just when you think you could pass out since their drone is now putting you to sleep, the rooster next door decides to add to the orchestra. this goes on for about an hour, until they’ve summoned so hard, the sun chooses to rise. and this goes on every morning… unfortunately I left my handy eye cover on the plane when I landed in El Salvador.

-I laid in bed trying to rest, only to become increasingly restless! my energy was back & I wanted a full-on day. 30 min later I ceased my inner resistance, went down to the kitchen & satisfied my hunger with some fruit. if only I knew how to light the element I’d brew some black tea. the house was still asleep, it was only after 6am. I pulled my camera out & began shooting the soft light coming through my favorite window in the home – stained glass, blue & yellow with an accenting green glass bottle below. a few more photos, then I returned back upstairs. I laid down, it was too early to shower, and eventually dosed off, in between Ukiah’s chattering & flute playing.

-a couple hours later, I sprang up, feeling as though I’d slept in. it was only 9:45am & everyone was awake, ready to head to the market. well, what’s one more day without showering? I’d not showered since arriving, which wasn’t a big deal considering I’d only been sleeping the past 2 days. thankfully I stopped using shampoo/conditioner in October, it’s allowed my hair to withstand days without doing anything to it, whereas before I had to wash it almost daily. and who knew Cusco didn’t have baking soda? one more thing to let go of J

-we all left for San Blas, a hip portion of downtown Cusco. we grabbed some salad & fresh mango lassies from a quaint café, spoke with the native artisan women who create with colourful fabric all day long, took photos with the young girls, their alpaca and baby sheep. after lunch Aerina wanted to climb this intense case of stairs, similar to the Grouse Grind’s last quarter only all steps, multiplied by 2 in distance & don’t forget the 11,000 feet elevation to begin with. we took a few short breaks, it’s amazing how winded I get from barely climbing anything! it was worth it though, to see the adobe tops of the city.

-the clouds began shifting to dark greys, loud thunder began to growl and we headed down the hill in the opposite direction toward the market. on the way Brook stopped for choco; tantalizing corn cooked on the streets by families. the rest of us were too full, but the bite I had was enough to entice me to return. I don’t know about corn, but Cusco has over 400 varieties of potatoes!! who vito’ed food diversity anyway? so much Incan brick & stone work was buried when the Spanish took over, but since they built overtop of everything, I was still able to see glimpses of what lies beneath. I didn’t take any photos of what they’d built-I couldn’t betray truth for lies & brainwashing. you could tell what was Incan, as they didn’t use any mortar to bind the stones together – they simply fit together like a puzzle.

the rain was spitting by now, warning us of what was to come. keep in mind, the day had been blue skies with white fluffy clouds, hot & many were sunburnt by the end. Brook sheltered me while I took shots of the aqueduct & stony stairway. everyone was walking on the sides of the streets, taking shelter under the small awnings that lead us into town. poncho & umbrella vendors came out from the alleys to sell what they carried. it wasn’t much for this Vancouverite, but it did remind me of how much i had to pee! we walked a block to another café, where Aerina knew we could go without paying. when we were ready to leave, the rain was coming down soooo hard, there was a river flowing downstream in front of our eyes. I took a quick video clip in all the excitement. several minutes later it began to ease up, so we ventured around taxis & traversed the rivers that weren’t there 15 minutes ago. I was squealing the entire time, it was too much fun! J

the highlight of my day was seeing a Peruvian woman bending over her son, maybe he was 3yrs old, doing something. For some reason we all looked back; she’d been undoing his pants & was now peeing into the flowing water. clearly his bladder also called when the rain let down. it was the sweetest thing, I wish I could’ve taken a photo, but it seemed too innocent to keep. dogs walked down the road together, another couple played in the grass. I surprisingly don’t feel bad for them, they seem to have their way of life sorted out; they run around wild, don’t bother anyone and find food where they can. we chowed on some beans & rice for $1 sole at the market then took a taxi home.

I went next door to the internet shop – I’ve never used such loose keys on a board before! the numeral keys have triple function for their accents and not all keys are where I expect them to be. Whapio bought me a reading light as a b-day gift, lol, and I finally moved my luggage to the attic since Aaron (pronounced Arun) had fixed the fumes issue and my energy was regained. It was great to set up the space Rose & I are sharing. it’s a long room, with 2 skylights and a ladder as the only access point. We’d heard “creatures” on the roof the other night, and chalked it up to rats on the roof. Well tonight, not only were we hearing them scurrying about, but they were in the walls, and more specifically, in the small crawl space close to my bed. I heard them running & then making mousey noises on the other side of the door. this small door is shut fairly tight, but just incase, I put a suitcase up against it for extra protection ;)

Julia, Natalie (friends of Claire) and Makenna arrived today. it’s been awesome having people trickle in and having been there from the beginning, so I could get to know everyone a bit first. Aerina & Scout cooked a hearty meal, (quinoa with salt, pepper, chopped avocado, a lot of fresh lime juice & tons of fresh cilantro – so yummy!) They sang happy b-day in Spanish & stuck a beeswax candle in my fried potato paddy. It was very sweet. I kept coming in and out of remembering it was my birthday, though the house kindly kept reminding me with love.

I finally head to the shower, by now the thunder had started up again & the blasts of lightning were strong. the hot water is only heated by a small coil that the water passes through before landing on the scalp. I played with the water pressure on the tap & from the source and struck heat!! what a luxury hot water is. I still feel a tingling in my hand when I turn it on, which apparently is normal, yet creepy. the dishes are washed with cold water too. it’s a different way of life, but it’s entirely manageable and the people of the land aren’t living in disease due to lack of cleanliness. (all the plates and glasses are reusable at the market as well.)

the night ended in a discussion on San Pedro, which is a cactus of this land. it’s sold in super markets, commonly used to enter an altered state, and very different from Ayahuasca. it’s not purgative like Ayahuasca is, it’s gentle, controlled by the dose one drinks, heart opening and very connected to nature. the ceremony for those who choose to participate, will take place at Abel’s (tattoo artist) brother’s home, close to the Sacred Valley, near Machu Pichu. I’d been contemplating this for months; I knew the opportunity to ingest plant medicine would arise on this trip.

everyone else’s opinion I was concerned about came rushing in my mind. again, I’m 30 and still being affected by my external surroundings? everything is coming down to honesty from within me. oh, did I leave that part out? while attempting to sleep this morning, I listened to another one of Master’s talks, which had me looking at where I’m internally at. lack of honesty in a very subtle manner has been showing it’s schizophrenic faces. what am I made of without the external telling me one way or another? once I got back to me, I saw if it was only me in the world, I would participate. it ties to my midwifery, standing at the gates of life, being in an altered state, being able to take action, instead of reacting in fear or resistance when women are traveling far into their cosmos, and i continuessly try to bring them back to this reality.